|
|
|
|
|
LAURA ON LIFE
|
I have a plan of attack for dealing with lazy children. It probably will work for adults, too. It's only fair that I should share this little pearl of wisdom with you.
If you have a child who can't remember to clear his plate off the table after dinner, put him in charge of washing dishes. If you have one who insists on using a different towel everyday after his shower instead of hanging it up and reusing it, put him in charge of the laundry. The teenager who ignores all requests not to leave his toenail clippings on the floor, should be put in charge of vacuuming.
I came across this amazing concept quite by accident one day when one of my older boys was just eight or nine years old. We had a family room in the basement of our house. The basement was in a chronic state of remodeling so the vertical supporting poles were still bare. My son would take every opportunity to try to climb up those poles, swing around and around on them, and beat on them (because they made such a satisfying gong). The noise that reverberated off those poles when I was upstairs, made nails on a blackboard sound good. It drove me nuts, which, admittedly, was a short putt.
One day, I just got sick of telling him for the millionth time not to do it, so I promoted him to the position of Pole Police. I told him that it was now his job to make sure that no one got near the poles and if anyone did, he had to send them to their room. He was thrilled with being given such a prestigious position in the household and took his "job" very seriously. In fact, when his older brother would as much as brush up against those poles, he took unholy pleasure in sending him to his room. Now that I was not in charge of the poles, no one could argue with me about the consequences of trifling with the poles, either.
I have used this technique many times over the years, but never was it more useful than just recently.
We have three bathrooms in our house, but the one that is most centrally located is the one my children use most often. My nine-year old, who is a bundle of joy half the time, and an annoying cretin the other half, has not quite mastered the concept of correct aim. There is no doubt that he is the one who misses the toilet 90% of the time. He holds it all day long and then comes home from school and goes like a stud racehorse.
My husband tried to talk to him about it. "Why can't you just aim for the inside of the toilet?"
"I try to, but sometimes it's just coming out too fast and it moves around a lot!" (Think fire hose.)
"Can't you hold on to that thing?"
"No!"
"Why not?!"
"If I get my hands dirty, then I'll have to wash my hands!"
Logical and demented at the same time, but it was the clue I needed to motivate the boy. He didn't want to get his hands dirty, so the thing to do was to put him in charge of cleaning the bathroom. This would also serve to suppress his urge to fling toothpaste all over the bathroom while he was supposedly brushing his teeth.
The plan was executed. Initially, he whined and complained, but it eventually became clear to him that the best way to not get his hands dirty was to not miss the toilet. He thought he was being clever by keeping the bathroom so clean that the next day there wouldn't be anything to clean up. That way he could get out of doing his assigned chore and mom couldn't say anything.
Boy… he really burned my britches, didn't he?
Laura Snyder may be reached at lsnyder@lauraonlife.com
Or check her website www.lauraonlife.com for archived columns
|
|
|
Click On Banner For More Information
|
